the sjs puzzle

figuring out what makes your parents tick is, as far as i can tell, a lifelong, rather ambitious project. luckily for me, my mom found a site that tells her.

Hi Hon: I looked this up on the internet, pretty accurate- what do you think?
have a good day, love you MOM

(no, i don't expect you to read all of that small, italicized text ... you'll get the gist below.)

You entered: Sandra Jean
Your number is: 6
The characteristics of #6 are: Responsibility, protection, nurturing, community, balance, sympathy.
The expression or destiny for #6:
The number 6 Expression provides you a truly outstanding sense of responsibility, love, and balance. The 6 is helpful and ever conscientious, making you quite capable of rectifying and balancing any sort of inharmonious situation. You are a person very much inclined to give help and comfort to those in need. You have a natural penchant for working with the old, the young, the sick, or the underprivileged. Although you may have considerable creative and artistic talents, the chances are that you will devote yourself to an occupation that shows concern for the betterment of the community. The positive side of the number 6 suggests that you are very loving, friendly, and appreciative of others. You have a depth of understanding that produces much sympathetic, kindness, and generosity. The qualities of the 6 make the finest and most concerned parent and one often deeply involved in domestic activities. Openness and honesty is apparent in your approach to all relationships. If there is an excess of the number 6 in your makeup, you may exhibit some of the negative traits associated with this number. There may be a tendency for you to be too exacting and demanding of yourself. In this regard, you may at times sacrifice yourself (or your loved ones) for the welfare of others. In some cases, the over zealous 6 has difficulty distinguishing helping from interfering. You may have difficulty expressing your own individuality, because of involvement with responsibilities and causes. Like all with the Expression of the number 6, it's quite likely that you worry much too much.
Your Soul Urge number is: 8
A Soul Urge number of 8 means:
With an 8 soul urge, you have a natural flair for big business and the challenges imposed by the commercial world. Power, status and success are very important to you. You have strong urges to supervise, organize and lead. Material desires are also very pronounced. You have good executive abilities, and with these, confidence, energy and ambition. Your mind is analytical and judgment sound; you're a good judge of material values and also human character. Self-controlled, you rarely let emotions cloud judgment. You are somewhat of an organizer at heart, and you like to keep those beneath you organized and on a proper track. This is a personality that wants to lead, not follow. You want to be known for your planning ability and solid judgment. The negative aspects of the 8 soul urge are the often dominating and exacting attitude. You may have a tendency to be very rigid, sometimes stubborn.
Your Inner Dream number is: 7
An Inner Dream number of 7 means:
You dream of having the opportunity to read, study, and shut yourself off from worldly distractions. You can see yourself as a teacher, mystic, or ecclesiastic, spending your life in the pursuit of knowledge and learning.

i can tell you that a lot of this stuff is true. she is sympathetic, kind and generous, and she's also very demanding on herself. but the interesting part came to me in a second email she sent with the subject line : Part 2. (which, from what i can tell, was the same as part 1, but i digress)

This is part 2- notice the soul urge thing- that would be me

Have a good one.

You should try this it is very interesing

MOM

so, basically, what she wanted to point out to me was not that she was loving or hyper-critical of herself but rather:
With an 8 soul urge, you have a natural flair for big business and the challenges imposed by the commercial world. Power, status and success are very important to you. You have strong urges to supervise, organize and lead. Material desires are also very pronounced.

although these things are also true, i thought it was an interesting part to call to my attention. mostly because of the material desires part but also because this -- of everything that was written -- is what she identified with most. that's the part i found most interesting. needless to say, my pursuit of figuring her out continues, with a little more insight.

(if you're wondering if i took her suggestion and tried it out for myself, the answer would be 'of course i did.'
my soul urge?

With the Soul Urge number 3 your desire in life is personal expression, and generally enjoying life to its fullest. You want to participate in an active social life and enjoy a large circle of friends.

pretty dead on. here's the link if you want to try it too)

ebony and ivory

so, this morning i found out i got laid off (yeah, sucks, but it could be worse). after calling my husband, i immediately called my mom. she was lovely and offered all the condolences one hears when shown the door.

the best part, though, was when i opened my inbox and saw an ecard from her. it was all about inspiration and leadership and spirituality. and all of the people in it had one distinct characteristic: they were all african-americans. so, clearly, my mom found it in the "ebony" "mahogany" section of hallmark's site.

anyway, i imagined her message at the end would be full of sweet, motherly things. and it was -- as only my mom could write it:

Hi Hon, well OK, you're not black, but I like the message of this card.
You'll come out ahead because of all your wonderful attributes and qualities.
Love you bunches,
MOM

shallow boundary waters

it's well-known that my mother, as my sister put it, "lacks boundaries."

my sister can tell you all about the sleepovers she had in her youth where my mom would hang out and take over.

or my brother can tell you about the time -- and this is a *classic* mom story, so wait for it ...

-- that my mother told him about how she hated their new Craftmatic beds because her husband got stuck in an uncomfortable position while ... well, i will spare you the details, but know that my brother was not so lucky.

there was also my wedding day, when she told one of my bridesmaids about how her husband likes her in thongs and what, exactly, she thought about it. "he bought be some beautiful ones, but i don't like those things riding up my butt! he should wear one!"

so it should come as no surprise that when my technologically-curious mother told me she joined Facebook, i should have worried more than i did.

not only has she gone through my photos and tagged herself as "MOM," but she's also taken to adding my friends (including the aforementioned bridesmaid) as her own. and i know this all sounds harmless and like i'm being overly sensitive, but if you knew your mom was fine with telling your brother about her sex life and that the second she publishes something on your Wall 300 of your closest friends get to see it instantly, wouldn't you be a little concerned?

so, really, this post is meant as a warning. a warning to all of my dear friends that she's out there, adding you. so if you're kind enough to add her back, you might want to make sure you have some privacy settings already in place.

txting 4 u, sjs

my mom is not what we would call "technical" yet she has these amazing gadgets -- she was first w/ the RAZR phone, first w/ the Mac, she has crazy awesome cameras and she now has an iphone. the thing is, she doesn't know how to use any of it.

so you can imagine my surprise when i started getting texts in "text language" (you know, lol, btw, c u l8r -- that stuff). there have been many, however most of them can't be deciphered by anyone i know. i asked her how she learned it and she told me "i don't know, i just watched someone and figured it out." whom she "watched" has not been determined, but they were clearly on drugs.

a short sampling is below in chrono order.
my all-time favorite from Oct. 2007:

I DNR c any celebs hope u r HCG be tm in to
Lv mom

(if someone can tell me what it means, you win a yet-to-be-determined prize)

------
from july 08:

Did u guys hv a eq?

Hvnt he the tv on 2dy

Went 2 mama MIA

Lvd it

Call me ltr

Lv

Mom

--------------
and, finally, from today:

Call me on my home ph later

At the outback now

Love you hon

Mom

you can see her skills on the phone have greatly improved (and from what i hear, everyone has some issues in the beginning of iphone texting). mostly i added this one just b/c she mentions writing me from Outback. now that's dedication to your kids.

uncle mark's in town/happy easter

tonight my mom called me -- slightly buzzed on her blush wine -- and told me all about her Easter Sunday.

it started w/ the church service and how she's thinking about defecting to the Presbyterians. then, it somehow progressed into a story about her lesbian friends hitting on her and trying to get her in a bathing suit (a bit of background: my mother is 61, married to a man and, frankly, brimming with naivete). something about feeling uncomfortable in a room alone with a wolf-tattooed lesbian discussing an oil painting ...

anyway, she then goes into how many "points" her wine is costing her tonight so it's good that she didn't eat a huge dinner (she made a full-on turkey dinner for the 3 of them). and, she tells my uncle mark, she's not counting the rice she ate last night b/c that shot right through her, so how could it have counted and left any fat/calories in her system? i can only hope uncle mark had smoked his Easter doob before hearing that one.

christ is risen. happy easter.